December 9, 2020

I realise this may be a little controversial – as society dictates that in order to “make something” of ourselves we need to BE or DO something extraordinary.

And up until recently, this was something I strived for too.

However I had a big revelation about this after an intense conversation with a mentor and I want to share this with you.

I’ve always had a deep desire to live an “extraordinary” life – and a strong aversion to any sort of mediocrity.

You see, from very young I was constantly told by those around me that I had a lot of potential. I was smart, pretty, “gifted”, talented, etc. etc. My piano teacher would tell me I could be a prodigy if I’d only practice. I aced the gifted test as a kid and went to school a year early. I had big dreams and was “going places”.

Here’s the problem with that.

I placed a lot of expectations on myself to live up to those labels, dreams and desires.

My biggest fear was that I would never actualise my potential and my “gifts” would go to waste…

What if I was *gasp* an ordinary person who just lived a mediocre, ordinary life? I literally could NOT think of anything worse!!!

So I put A LOT of pressure and expectation on myself, and in my teenage years and early 20’s this played out in a vicious cycle of falling into periods of procrastination, self-sabotage and in-activity, the very thing I was most fearful of. (I call this the “blah” state).

When I dug deeper into this fear – this fear of wasting my life away – and never quite reaching the heights of extraordinary,

What I discovered was a question.

Would I still be loved by those around me if I failed to meet those expectations? What if I never lived up to the labels of gifted, talented, special, smart?

Could I possibly be okay with NOT being all of these things?

Would I still be lovable if I wasn’t any of these things?

Ouff. There it is. All my insecurities subtly wrapped up in one simple question.

Through all of this, here’s what I’ve discovered.

By REMOVING the pressure and expectation – and being okay with simply being “ordinary” – it gives us FREEDOM OF CHOICE to pursue our dreams and desires – and do “extraordinary things”…

Simply because we want to and because that’s ready and available for all of us.

And for no other reason.

No pressure.

No expectation.

No labels to live up to.

Just complete and total free will.

What if the secret to being extraordinary actually lies in being ordinary? After all, it’s ordinary people that do extraordinary things, right?

If striving for extraordinary has kept you exhausted and hasn’t gotten you to where you want to be yet… you may try just being “ordinary” too 🙂

H. xx

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